Cosmetic Facial Acupuncture

Im making a science fiction story, can u check out this excerpt if its ok?

Lights flicker from below. A surge of hot air follows which comes from el toso -the loose fertile soil beneath the mojo layer somewhere near the abyssmal crevasse of mont dun. The stinge of the colonies rise from the depths, and above are transluscent canopies covered with greenish blue matter known as ragmoss -grass hybrids which excrete enzymes that convert ultraviolet rays and carbon dioxide into a slimy form of starch, helping them to cling on to rocks and loose soil.
At night, the pitch black outer side of the white lining reveals terramids feeding over the vast fields of mimosa biloba. But of course, it’s impossible to see them, because of the extreme cold weather outside. At one point, the cold fuses the ragmoss together, forming a permafrost for 34 days from whence they can be harvested. Then the baccus begins within the 28 days of winter solstice.
I remember, i could see from where i stand the lush vertical forests illuminating under the vast white lining, as

It sounds like you’ve put a lot of thought into this setting, and it’s a very good start. I recommend you take a look at the link below, it’s got some informal writing lessons by Orson Scott Card that I think would be useful to you. Keep up the good work!

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